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we started tkd when my son was 8. He was diaganosed with adhd and tourettes syndrome. He was taking meds, He had low self esteem, was a follower and was being teased. fortunatly he doesnt have anger issues. it was his dr that turned me on to tkd and my master. They play golf together. what a great gift he gave to me. corey is now a 13 yr old 7th grader!!( wow) He is confident, a leader and makes great choices in friends, peer pressure, and school work, it isn't always easy mind you. The best thing of all he is no longer on meds, i think age and maturity play a part, but most of all it is what we are being taught at the dojang and we live it in our daily lives also, it's not just something you do in class. I see alot of parents that dont do class with there kids or familys and they don't really get what tkd is about!!!! I guess im fortunate, at my dojang they offer belt level classes which children and adults do together, sometimes we seperate but for the most part we don't , they also offer all belt classes for any belt level above white and also offer just kid classes and there is a family class for belts in the same home that are different levels, which works great since corey and i are high brown and my daughter is green. i have found most schools will only do seperate classes. it is fun to look over and watch my son doing the same things as I. Or seeing his face when sabumnim gives out a rare complement!! give your son some time, he will be fine, as parents we worry how are children will be when they grow up, will they make good choices and be successful, my feelings on these questions is this,,, my husband and I turned out to be good people with values and morals and we have hopefully instilled these qaulities into our children, teaching your children empathy i think is a big key emotion to have for a successful life, with out empathy we cannot relate to one anothers life experiences. you will find that tkd will help your boys with not only self confidence and self control, but also being more responsible and being accountable for the actions they take. take a load off mom, their gonna be great men!!!  hope i didnt get to far off subject, i tend to ramble, it's the adhd in me!!!
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no sacrifice no victory
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| POSTED BY: Linda on 02/25/2008 05:36:09 |
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My boy is 7 and has flitted in and out of training
His sister started at the same time although she had 4 years of gym experience previously and has won loads of medals/trophies with her TKD, I think he finds this a setback.
It's difficult to help him understand that he can't progress at the same rate as her as he is a completely different child, kids just don't seem to understand sometimes and only want instant gratification!!!
Another thing which is completely annoying is that he won't sit down and learn his korean! On the other hand I have to remind myself that he is only 7 and this is not the most important thing in his life right now, he has plenty of years ahead of him. Our instructor tells him how good he is at his patterns (when he puts his mind to it) however I have refused to pay the money for him to grade when he won't concentrate properly, I'm quite happy to wait until he makes the decision to do it himself, like I say he has plenty of time. We just keep reminding him that TKD is a useful skill which will see him through the rest of his life etc
Not working at the moment though!
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Don't stop trying
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Awesome post taekwondojunkie ... and what a perspective to learn by! Each child is different. I have had 3 children who have gone up the ranks with me. Unfortunately I am the only one left still climbing! It's funny though .... now after being out of that environment thay do realize that it did give them self confidence and control - and I saw that for the most part from all of them at the time. What I find is that if you have to force your child to go to class then it's not going to develop those traits AT ALL.
My youngestr son stopped taking TKD when he got heavily involved in the Pop Warner football program here in town which takes up a great deal of time. That was 6 years ago. He will be entering high shool as a freshman later this year and told me weeks ago that he is interested in getting back into TKD.... maybe he realizes now what he is missing from not training. Live & learn  (special thanks to Linda for setting up this TKD Parents forum! - I did miss my TKD Parent Group on the former site.... hopefully all the TKD parents will find their way back to us!)
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Tae Kwon Do is practiced by 50 million people in 160 different countries. If everyone who studied Tae Kwon Do joined hands, they could form a line that would stretch around the globe 1.25 times!
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kixstart wrote:
Hi,
I have 2 boys and they are both training in TKD. I would like to know if you find that the TKD helps with the following :
Self Confidence
Self Control
I have certainly seen a big improvement in my oldest boys behavior, but my youngest 10 years old, seems to be getting worse (maybe its just his age?)
Let me know your thoughts ....
Kix
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Came in very late to this one, but I'll jump in anyway. To answer your question; yes and yes. Regarding your ten year old, is the getting worse a patern in class, out of class or just in general? One thing to consider is that if a child is growing physically, they tend to not mature as quickly emotionally and socially. The body and mind are concernted with physical growth during a growth sprout and so emotional maturity takes a back seat. My youngest was always at his worst when he was growing the fastest. In addition to that, he has a lot of focus issues in general. He became interested in kumdo after watching Rurouni Kenshin and I thought that a martial art would help him. He began Kumdo at eleven and it seemed a constant fight to keep him on task both in and out of class. But he got through, earned his black belt and made the honor roll in school. Now, he makes the honor roll regularly. He just started TKD and is a much different student than he was at eleven. The previous MA experience boosted his confidence both in and out of TKD. When kids at school heckle him (everyone gets heckled in middle school), he just blows them off rather than getting upset. After all, he's a black belt and knows that he can handle himself. He still has to work on focusing and sometimes, his self control isn't what it should be, but then, what fourteen year old's is? Long answer to a short question, but its sort of like a dietary change; you won't notice the difference immediately, but as time goes on, I think you will see the results. Also, keep in mind that he is only ten and things that mature a child take longer to sink in at that age. I know it did for me! Kix, this thread was started on Feb 18. How is he doing in TKD? Best wishes, Daniel
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교사 Yidan kumdo, yigeub taekwondo
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One piece of advice for teaching kids...
ZERO downtime in class.
That means keep em moving. No more than 5 to 10 minutes for the same drill. It's when they get bored that you start to lose their attention, and then subsequently, your control over them.
Another BIG mistake... giving too much negative attention.
Kids need attention. And so many times, if they feel deficient in that department, they'll act up a bit to see if you're paying attention. So... there's a strategy you can use, to keep from playing right into their hands...
Play 'caughtchadoin-good!' with em... When you've got one fiddling... pick out the kid who's getting it right... have the class check em out and have em see if they can 'join in'... praise them... and when you come to that one that's flaking off... address them... let the little wonder know, "Hey... you're almost there... do what they're doing and you're there too... (I use the 'point' system... points given towards earning a star for great effort...)
It can take some patience, but it seems to work pretty good...
Obviously, this 'pattern' does NOT apply for 'serious' infractions, like bashing a classmate, or swinging like Tarzan from the heavy bag, and so on...
Basically you're playing the manipulation game... some kids act up, because negative attention beats zero...(They usually don't realize that's what they're doing)
By playing this manipulation game right... you trick em into doing RIGHT, to get what they want... which IS, attention.
With the kids though... I really try to keep the energy level UP... With a faster class pace... they are almost forced to listen to keep up...
I also do what my last instructor did... I always bring em back to attention BEFORE I shift gears... that let's them know that we're changing gears, so I don't get em confused...(Which is almost as bad as boring them.)
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Getting through life takes just a LITTLE bit of insanity!*g*
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| POSTED BY: kixstart on 05/04/2008 17:51:32 |
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Just to keep everyone up to date, my youngest is concentrating more now. I think the comment from Celtic Tiger had a good point that I hadnt thought about before. My youngest was growing quite significantly at the time (so much that he needs a new uniform ) so maybe that was part of it.
Thanks everyone for your input. It walways helps to have another perspective on the situation
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Learn as though you would never be able to master it; hold it as though you would be in fear of losing it....
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Good to hear Kixx .... they do grow up so fast don't they?? That is what this forum is all about ... many of us have "been there- done that" and can offer some advice ... and if it works in this case that's awesome! Celtic: btw, good advice!
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Tae Kwon Do is practiced by 50 million people in 160 different countries. If everyone who studied Tae Kwon Do joined hands, they could form a line that would stretch around the globe 1.25 times!
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| POSTED BY: kalynn on 05/12/2008 11:58:39 |
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I think it makes a big difference for them. It's also an expectation thing. I think we all rise to the expectations of others. If you're at a good school then your kids want to be what their instructors believe they can become.
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A Taekwondo Woman
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| POSTED BY: bazza on 05/28/2008 20:26:02 |
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Linda wrote:
My boy is 7 and has flitted in and out of training
His sister started at the same time although she had 4 years of gym experience previously and has won loads of medals/trophies with her TKD, I think he finds this a setback.
It's difficult to help him understand that he can't progress at the same rate as her as he is a completely different child, kids just don't seem to understand sometimes and only want instant gratification!!!
Another thing which is completely annoying is that he won't sit down and learn his korean! On the other hand I have to remind myself that he is only 7 and this is not the most important thing in his life right now, he has plenty of years ahead of him. Our instructor tells him how good he is at his patterns (when he puts his mind to it) however I have refused to pay the money for him to grade when he won't concentrate properly, I'm quite happy to wait until he makes the decision to do it himself, like I say he has plenty of time. We just keep reminding him that TKD is a useful skill which will see him through the rest of his life etc
Not working at the moment though!
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There's a kid I train with, must be about 7. Sometimes (often) he is a nightmare to have in class. He doesn't listen and my instructor will warn him until he makes him sit out. He talks back and doesn't pay attention. I thought he'd never test.
My instructor never held him back from grading. Somehow he always gets through. He's up to 7th gup now.
A few weeks ago we found out that (at school, I guess) he doodled his entire form using stick figures.
Sometimes he can perfectly spit out pattern meetings and we all have to scoop our chins off the floor because I'm telling you, he doesn't ever seem to be paying attention.
On occasion, when I get paired up to work with him, he'll tune in for a few minutes and I coach and encourage him and he does quite well. But there is no consistency or predictability in his performance. And it's a shame, because I honestly believe he could be quite good if he put more effort into it. But he's so young and unfocused...he's a kid!
My point is, I don't think you should stop your child from grading; I'm not saying reward bad behavior, but he won't be motivated if he doesn't feel he can move on. I often feel this kid I've talked about shouldn't grade, shouldn't train, but he somehow comes through and does quite well, and I don't think he would if he were not allowed to grade.
Of course, I don't know your son, so I can only speak from my own experience with this particular child.
Taekwon. |
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