Murphy's Laws of Martial Arts

The wimp who made it through the eliminations on luck alone will suddenly turn into Bruce Lee when you're up against him. (My instructor will be nice until she is called to a fighting stance then she can be scary)

The referee will always be looking the other way when you score.

You will have trouble with the ties on your dobok pants when members of the opposite sex are in class.

The day you leave work early to make it to class on time, the instructor will be sick.

The instructor will only use you during demonstrations for joint-locking techniques.

If you have to use your training in self-defense, your attacker's father will be a lawyer.

After a flawless demonstration, you will trip on your way back to your seat.

After years of training without a single injury, you will pull a groin muscle the night before your black belt exam.

In an otherwise vacant locker room, the only other person will have the locker right next to yours.

No matter how many times you take care of it before your promotion exam, you will invariably have to go to the bathroom when it's your turn.

The last one applies to me. No matter how many times I go before I always feel like I'm going to wet myself during testing. Maybe next time it will be better. Those are pretty funny.

If you're over 40 you will be the oldest person in the sparring class by at least 15 years.  If you're a woman the age drops to 30.

When 2 yellow belts spar, they will bang knees even if it's non-contact.

The one time you forget to put on your cup...(this applies to mouthpieces, too).

You might bring extra uniform tops, but you will NEVER have extra uniform pants.

Males always get beaten to a pulp the first time they spar against females.

Red Gatorade will always spill on your nice clean dobok.

everyone else probably found this funny apart from me.

on monday we had a seminar with master choi jung hwa ( son of general choi ) and i have been training extra in order to put in a good performance. on sunday i booked the hall for an extra hour to practise my patterns and halfway through i heard my hamstring pop and i hit the floor like a ton of bricks. no serious injuries in 18 years of training and i get one the day before probably my most important training session. i still managed the class with the help of loads of painkillers and deep heat but i spent most of it limping around as though i'd had an accident at the toilet.