I'll always remember my first grading as the worst (in terms of nerveracking anyway. There's definately been experiences i'd rather forget in gradings).
Not knowing what to expect, being the first group in wiht no time to revise my terminology in the waiting area, watching the first ten or so people grade all helped me to feel as if i was about to explode with nervousness that day!
Once i got on the floor though, i was fine, nerves vanished, i tried my hardest, shouted the loudest, although in hindsight i was probably just terrible at my techniques. Isn't that always the way? You think you're doing something great and giving 200% and someone always manages to outperform you and do it ten times better! Yet makes it look so effortless? What IS the secret to that??!
I was so relieved once i got out of that room! Sat round nervously chewing on my nails all day waiting for the lesson which was to be held later that day so we could find out if we passed, to learn our new patterns and possibly some of our new techniques.
The longest 8 hours of my life passed by painfully slowly! Then all of a sudden i found myself outside my dojang. 5 mins until i would find out. 4 mins. 3 mins. 2mins...
I had passed :D
Recieved congratulations form my instructor and the black belts and senior grades whi kindly informed me the worst was over... for now anyway (one of them thought was appropriate to tell me! as if i hadnt been through enough already! haha)
I was glowing with pride as i tied my FIRST ACHIEVED BELT on. May not be a big deal for some, but to me it meant EVERYTHING! I mean, this was me who a few years back never would have set foot in a dojang! And now i'd managed to pass a grading!
Learnt my new pattern Chon Ji, which again, i seemed to pick up pretty quickly - i would go on to discover that this is the ONLY area of taekwondo that i am remotely talanted at (speed of learning)!
Another three months passed, and i found myself at my secind grading. Yep the nerves were still there but this time i knew what to expect, AND had the time beforehand to go over my terminology for one last time. Passed my second grading with a +pass. Once again, had that great feeling of tying my new YELLOW belt on. Learning another new pattern, Dan Gun. 'YES!' i thought, 'Now i have a choice of patterns to perform in class!'
And then i felt that i truly belonged in the doljang, that now i had earned two belts i had as much right to be there, as much right as the people one grade above me, as much right as the black belts and even as much right as the senior grade who for some reason took a dislike toward me and laughs at me frequently, now THAT'S another tale!
