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Parents..Ya Gotta Love 'Em
Posted On 04/12/2008 21:33:58 by LillyMyrrh

I ran into my parents in WalMart the other day. I asked them to come to my next belt testing on May 30th. (I know it's still a ways off, but with my parents, plans have to be made well in advance. They're always going off on some trip or other. Plus my Dad works offshore.) The reason this particular testing is so important to me is that my husband & I will be going for our black belts.

I don't really know how to take their response. My Mom said, "Are you SURE you want us to be there?" I mean, if I didn't want them there, would I have asked them? Of course I want them there. Yes, I realise I might not make it, but I still would like to know that they are there cheering me on.  If not, I would have waited until I knew I had gotten it and only invited them to the award ceremony.

I'd also like for my kids & my in-laws to be there. It's not likely that my son can come, he's in Germany. Nor is it all that likely that my daughter & her family can come, they will have just moved to Pennsylvania. And it's only a little more like for my in-laws to be there, they live about 3 or 4 hours away. But my parents live right here in the same town. I'm even planning on asking my brother & his family to be there. (They live in the same town, too.)

I guess sometimes, the little girl in me still wants to know that my Mom & Dad are in my corner & proud of me.



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Viewing 1 - 3 out of 3 Comments

From: kixstart
04/14/2008 11:16:16
You are brave...Im like tkdq. I never ask anyone to come to my gradings, in fact this time I asked them not to come. Im always nervous and them being there makes me more so. Its sad really
I enjoy the tests thought when I do them, and the funny thing is Im so involved I probably wouldnt notice if they were there!!
I feel bad for you though, if you really want them there and they dont seem to be very interested. Sometimes people are shy of the martial arts, they think its all some big mystery and want to keep away from anything to do with it. If only they knew eh?


From: tkdq
04/13/2008 12:51:29
I have to agree up to a point. I wish I had your confidence, I never ask anyone to come and watch me grade purely because I don't want to look like an idiot! I have a big issue with looking like an overweight middle aged mum trying to do martial arts-so I go it alone.

When I reap my reward for the efforts made-I show off and get ridiculously confident saying-I wish you had come to watch!!! I need help!!

Like you narcsarge my dad is a....well can't find an appropriate word for him, but I have never been good enough (he challenged me to an IQ test when I was 16years old-he thought I was stupid!!) So I tend not to care about what he thinks-he is ugly on the inside.


From: narcsarge
04/13/2008 11:04:20

Ohhhh this sounds way too familiar.  Last time I asked my parents anything was September 2003.  I advised my Mother that my wife and son and I would be up in Maryland for Christmas.  Man you should have heard her about not giving her much time to make plans. 

One thing I learned from that little experience, never ask a question.  I don't ask my parents anything any more.  I let them know what my plans are tell them what I expect from them. 

Like:

ME:  Mom, Dad, I have am having my Black Belt test on July 25th and, if it doesn't interfere with your plans, I would like you to join me and my family. 

I won't argue the point and I don't care if they come or not.  I too search for some sort "recognition" that I never got from them as a kid (I am the middle child by the way ).  I fit the Middle Child psychological profile to a "T"!  That being said, I have come to realize that parents are no different then anyone else we meet.  They do the same things that other people do to upset us.  It just hurts more because of the "parent" title.  I tend to care more about the recognition of my own family then I do from my Mom and Dad.  My family is less likely to remind me how I "failed" in some manner....  





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